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  • Writer's pictureAlisa Collins

How to Stop Complaining

This week, I complained.

A lot.

I was miserable the whole time.

And, I was mad because I was miserable.

Not fun!

Why do we do this to ourselves?

It always feels terrible to complain.

Complaints come from negative feelings.

Negative feelings feel,...well, negative.

But we do it over and over.

If we complain, our brain is letting us know that we know how it should be. It's just the rest of the world that hasn't figured it out. We are smarter than everyone else.

Gather with your friends, and there is a sense of camaraderie when we complain together. You tell me your terrible story and I'll tell you mine. And we'll both feel terrible. (We better meet at a bar, so we can numb the feelings with some wine.)

This week I had several thoughts that kept popping into my head.

"This isn't right."

"It shouldn't be this way."

"It's the principle..."

When I get into telling myself a story and saying, well, it's not the thing - but it's the principle of it. I am just judging the crap out of the entire world.

So how do we all STOP complaining?

First, you have to be AWARE you are complaining. Make it a game. Guess how many times you complain in a day. Then, every time you complain, write it down. How close did you get? Can you complain less tomorrow?

Second, be the light. When you start noticing how much you complain, you will REALLY notice how much everyone else does. Don't join the pity party. Be the light that steers a negative conversation to something positive. Leave a conversation in a better place than when it started.

Third, be grateful. It is impossible to TRULY feel grateful and complain at the same time. But you have to be grateful. (Don't slide a negative comment in on the gratefulness. Like, vacation was great, but it rained the whole time.)

Try it this week!

Until next time,


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