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  • Writer's pictureAlisa Collins

Five things you can do today to feel better

Everyone wants to feel better.

It's just human nature to want to move away from negative emotion as soon as possible.

So what are my tops five tips for feeling better?

Drum roll, please...

  1. Stop judging yourself. We all judge ourselves constantly. Just think about it. There's probably something that happened in your past you are still judging. And there's perhaps something that happened today that you are judging. We think if we are "hard on ourselves," we'll finally get into shape, lose weight, get a new job, or find the love of our lives. That's never true. Judgment never brings something positive.

  2. Stop judging other people. Staying on this same theme, if most people would do this one, their life would drastically improve. Why don't we? We are so invested in our story about why other people are a problem. If "they" would just be different than they are. If "they" didn't say what they said. If "they" didn't do what they did. Our judgment of "they" causes us a lot of negative emotions. Just try it for a week (OK, OK, a DAY) and see if you don't feel better. Keep track of how quickly you go to judgment. (You are probably doing that now.)

  3. Accept that it is OK not to be happy all the time. Never in the history of the world has an adult human lived in complete happiness. From Adam and Eve to you, nobody has a life full of joy, where there was no misery, sadness, or generally feeling awful. So likely, you and I will have many times in our lives when we aren't happy. So, how does that help me feel better, you ask? Life is sometimes sucky --- but don't add more "suck" to it by believing it should be different. If you think life shouldn't be sucky some of the time, then you are even MORE miserable. Understand that being human sometimes isn't fun, and that's OK.

  4. Don't believe everything your brain tells you. I was slow to learn this one, but it's true. Our brains LOVE to spin out of control on every conceivable negative thing possible. It loves to be in the middle of a lot of drama. (Why do you think Facebook, Twitter, and 24/7 news make billions of dollars?) Our brains were divinely designed to keep us safe, which is terrific, but there aren't too many man-eating tigers in my neighborhood. So sometimes, it's best to tell my brain to chill. Take the time to question if your brain is giving you a complete view of the situation. Or, is it just telling you a story because it senses danger---even if there isn't any real danger of physical harm? Question if there is another way to think about the situation.

  5. Love is always the correct answer. This sounds like you should get out your rose-colored glasses and run through a field of daisies, but the truth is, every situation is better if you come from a position of love. Loving people you don't like is a beautiful thing. It doesn't mean you have to hang out with them, condone what they do, or agree with them. But if you can make room for a bit of love and compassion, even the worst things are a little better. I'm not saying it is easy. I'm just saying it will help you feel better about yourself and better about everything going on around you.

If you've found this information helpful, you may find having a life coach helpful. Just like a sports coach, a life coach can help you see things from a new perspective, open doors you didn't know were there, and help you create some fantastic things in your life. I know that is what coaching has done (and continues to do) for me.

If you are interested, you can learn more at



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